I thought that I might not have anything to write on the
blog this week. I have been feeling a bit allergy-riffic, which kind of takes
the energy and the anger out of me. Both of those are usually required for me
to write a post. To be fair, curiosity usually plays a role in there too. And
then this article came across my desk, and I was ready for some typing action!
This week, Stephanie Smith penned
an article in which she explains her 300 sandwich project. This is not her making 300
sandwiches for individuals who are homeless or for children who cannot afford
school lunches or for people who have escaped domestic violence situations.
This project follows her process as she makes 300 sandwiches for her boyfriend, in order to prove that she is wife
material, so he will marry her. Apparently, this project came about through an
off-handed remark that he made about her being 300 sandwiches away from an
engagement ring. He is even quoted as saying, “Make me a sandwich,” to his
ever-hopeful, potential future fiancé in the morning.
Normally, I try to stay relatively neutral on my blog posts.
(Okay, neutral-ish, sort of.) I want this blog to be exploratory and a
conversation starter. However, I am really struggling with this one, because I
want to tell her to RUN AWAY FROM THIS DUDE. But, okay let's be more exploratory. On
the one hand, we do need to support our significant others, and feeding them is one way to do that. Also, if you like cooking
and express your love through food, I am totally on board with you. On the other hand, if someone is using a task to see if you
measure up as a partner, then we have a problem. Love does not ever translate
to the equation of making sandwiches (or losing weight, cleaning house,
speaking less, agreeing more, having children, bowing down, etc.) = getting the
magical engagement ring of commitment. If this comes up in your relationship, it
might be time to be honest with yourself and to ask if this person celebrates
who you are. Do they truly love YOU or who they can mold you into? A question
we must always ask ourselves in all of our relationships.
A part of me is hoping this is joke. I want this to be true
for her sake. I want her to be in a healthy, supportive relationship. I want
that for everyone! I just don’t think that making 300 sandwiches is the way to
get one.
-
Lauren, incredibly perplexed by this whole
situation
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