Wow, THAT was fucked up.

I am sure that many of you have seen the reactions to the Steubenville rape trial, where two male high school football students were convicted of raping a female student. People have been all over the place. Some have been asking for more jail time for the rapists. A large majority have been dismissive of their actions as boys having fun. It was Henry Rollins who made the excellent point that these males do not live in a bubble, and it is our society that has created an environment where rape is allowed to happen over, and over, and over again. We don’t take sexual assault seriously, and we consistently blame the survivor. 

I became acutely aware of this last week, when I was in Portland for vacation. I somehow managed to catch a cold, so my boyfriend and I were in our host apartment attempting to nap, when I heard an insistent knock on the door across the hall. A group of people identified themselves as Crisis Responders, and they requested to speak to the woman inside, who I will call T. The first person spoke very broadly about how T might be thinking about hurting herself, and the team would like to talk to her. The next voice came from the police officer on the team. She said, “T, we were told that you need to file a police report, because you were assaulted last night. We really need to talk to you about that.” She went on a bit about filing. The woman refused to answer the door, so the police officer continued, “Look T, if you are tired of hearing my voice, then there are some handsome men in the hallway who would like to speak with you.” The woman refused to answer the door, so they left their card and walked away.

Let’s think about this for a second. This is a (probable) rape survivor (considering that she is a female who has been traumatized), AND A MEMBER OF THE CRISIS TEAM JUST TOLD EVERYONE and then INVITED HER TO SPEAK WITH STRANGE MEN IN THE HALLWAY! What the fuck? I just can’t. 

We have to change. When the people who are directly responding to rape survivors don’t take it seriously and don’t treat survivors with respect, then EVERYTHING must shift IMMEDIATELY.   

    

-          Lauren, Innocent bystander turned grievance filer